Where do we go to find love? Oh man, the question that people who have yet to fall in love probably obsess over. Just where do I go to find this person? Wouldn’t it be great if there were some Foursquare, Facebook Places or SCVNGR game that we could play to find our love?? Games + relationships. Badges to unlock. Challenges to do or give. Location based meetups. This could be a really cool startup idea! Haha, if you find this interesting, send me an email at findfoodlove@gmail.com. We can talk startups!
One would think that there are so many opportunities to meet people. Your childhood, school, interest groups, church, friends of friends, family friends, study abroad, vacationing, people you work with, people you meet…but yet with all these different possibilities, for some reason, it seems difficult to meet someone who you can connect with on all fronts (or even good friends for that matter).
School seems like a good place to meet someone. People are around the same age, lots of social events, and people have a little more flexibility with their time especially during breaks (though barring med school). Going into business school, I thought the prospects of meeting someone would be very high. The person would be somewhat filtered, probably possess similar priorities in life, and the female percentage is like 30% (what better stats than that?!). Granted, there are people who do meet their special someone in b-school (yea!), but anecdotally, it seems that many singles, especially women, do not come out marrying someone from business school.
A friend recently sent over an interesting article asking why are there so many single ladies in b-school? (for full disclosure, this friend is a guy who did not go to b-school, as far as I know, and says he has other buddies who have similar observations). The article is attached below, and one major reason it suggests--and that most guess--is that these women are too focused on career (and you probably can apply this context to any woman pursuing graduate studies).
Well, I mean, if you go to business school, you probably do want to do something in and with your career, right? It only makes sense. But, the discussion does bring up a valid point that women SEEM aggressive, not willing to follow men, and would choose career rather than settle down with a family. All valid points to a degree, of course depends on the person, but I think as women, we should really consider the perception we give.
But, on the other hand, I think men need to consider this point. If she isn’t married, then she can’t have kids (or at least, that’s not plan A), and what if no one comes around? She will be on her own and she has to sustain herself financially and socially. In many ways, even for those who do marry, there still will be times of loneliness, of not being understood or not provided for.
Back to the where question—I guess there really is no one place to meet someone even when it seems to make a lot of sense. But no matter what our status, I think good things will come if we stay social, care for others, show care to our family, friends, strangers, and believe that we are looking for a good fit, not just any fit.
With that said, here is a brainstorm of possible ways we could meet that right person, or even platonic friends. Not comprehensive at all, as online dating is always an option.
1) Join groups where people know each other. They would then be more likely to introduce you to people whom you can get to know. Associations, professional groups, church groups, religious gatherings, volunteer organizations that interact with other people. Or, maybe it's time to mix up our groups and go where we don’t know people. Maybe I should take my own advice…
2) Talk to people. People do help other people, and they might have ideas for you. Ask, and ye shall find. Don’t ask and don’t find.
3) Meetups. By interests, by activities. Grubwithus.com might be an idea. You have dinner with a group of strangers. The startup recently became a Y Combinator startup. Outdoor activities that rotate players could be interesting. Exercise classes, going to matches or competitions with friends - the person competing could have different circles of friends. If you go to a party, I find it's not just about "being" at the parties or going to places. It's more about interacting with people and meeting through a conversation. I have been to parties where all the people who know each other just keep talking to each other. It’s easier, and sometimes it’s good to do it, but maybe it’s time to put in that extra bit of effort.
4) Old friends. So, here's one that could be really interesting. People you grew up with or have known for a long time, but never dated because it never came up due to timing or something. Time does tell.
Article “All the Single Ladies?”:
http://www.whartonjournal.com/
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